Paul Mitchell, Naracoorte News

Chantelle Weckert was born to be a mother—but being single and nearly 40 is an unconventional platform for such a life-changing leap.

Fortunately, the popular Naracoorte preschool director was prepared for the possibility of becoming a sole parent if Mr Right failed to walk through the door.

In January 2022, Chantelle decided to freeze her eggs.

“It was at this point I started talking to some friends and family who had been through the IVF process,” Chantelle explains.

“My family was all immediately supportive.”

She froze her eggs in November 2022, selected a donor in July 2023, and had her “implementation” in July 2024.

She is now just weeks—maybe days—away from becoming a mother.

“I’m blessed—with the help of some science—that my dream of becoming a mum is finally becoming a reality,” Chantelle says.

“It has been a long, well-thought-out, emotionally and mentally exhausting experience over several years…

“But it has not been a ‘hurried’ decision or a decision based on that biological clock that people are keen to remind you is ticking—like you don’t already know!”

In a bid to help de-stigmatise the frozen eggs/single parent scenario (if such a stigma still exists), Chantelle was kind enough to answer any and all questions on the topic for The [Naracoorte] News.

Channy puts all her eggs in motherhood basket

Below are her responses, which include:

• Why she hasn’t found a long-term partner
• Why she made the decision to freeze her eggs
• How she chose the donor
• The response once people found out about her pregnancy
• Her advice (and warning) to others thinking of taking the same pathway

The obvious question is, what led you to make this decision?

My whole life I have known I was born to be someone’s mum. For years I have watched so many people that I love begin their families. I’ve been to more baby showers than I can remember. I’ve cuddled and loved so many children in my life and been blessed to spend my days with other people’s amazing children through my career.

I have said for quite a number of years (probably most of my 30s) that if I hadn’t met Mr Right, I would freeze my eggs and look at having babies on my own.

You’re a vivacious, attractive, funny, and intelligent woman. Why hasn’t it happened along more conventional lines for you? Is there a shortage of men in Naracoorte?

I’ve been asked this exact question so many times over the years, and it used to upset me.

I used to wonder what I had done so wrong in a past life to be the only one of all of my friends to never have found that connection with someone, that great love.

I questioned everything, and it did once really wreak havoc on my feelings of self-worth. But at the end of the day, I’m not content with settling for someone for the sake of it.

Meeting people and ‘dating’ has changed so much in the last five years. I’m not that interested in dating apps, and they honestly are the way of the world, and that’s not something I’ve ever been 100 percent comfortable with.

I’ve met and had relationships and connections with some amazing people (and some average ones).

I have loved, and I have absolutely had my heart crushed, and that has made me into the woman I am today. A woman who knows her value and worth. A woman who knows that she can write her own narrative.

What responses/reactions have you had from people when you’ve told them?

I have always been very upfront and honest about my story.

When I froze my eggs, many people were aware. When I was going through the IVF process, I spoke openly about that too.

I don’t see the point in hiding the truth from people; it’s nothing to be ashamed of. If anything, I am proud of the way I have handled myself and my story, and I think that’s part of the reason people have been so supportive.

I would rather be open and have people ask me questions directly so that I am able to give them the truthful answers.

Part of the reason I am so open is I know how many people struggle with fertility and creating their own families. I know that there is no such thing as a ‘nuclear’ family. All families are different.

And at the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that children are brought into this world being wanted and loved. One thing I know for sure is that my baby will be loved and adored not just by me but by many in my incredible village.

You love your sister Rachel’s kids like your own. Did they play a part in you making this call?

I have always treated my sister’s children (and all of the children in my life—family, friends) as my own.

I chose a career that sees me engaging with and shaping the lives of young children every day. I really believe some people are born to play a role in children’s lives, and for me that is as an aunt, teacher, and most importantly, a mother.

I knew that I would look back and absolutely regret not having children, and that is not something I ever wanted to face.

Can you tell me about the support from your family?

My family has been incredible.

I have always been close with my family, and they know better than anyone else how important this is to me. Their support through the entire journey so far has meant everything. From the silly questions to the tears and frustration, to the setbacks and the worry, to the ‘what ifs’ and the ‘what now’s,’ to the moment we heard the words “congratulations, you’re pregnant,” and finally when each new week rolls around and my four-year-old nephew excitedly asks, “Channy, how big is your baby now?” I am so grateful to have each and every one of them.

My friends and colleagues have been amazing, and the fact that this little human is referred to as “our baby” by people in many circles speaks volumes.

How do you feel right now? What’s the mix of emotions?

Throughout the whole journey, I’m pretty sure I’ve felt every emotion that exists. If I could choose five right now, I would say grateful, excited, nervous, hopeful, and brave.

Can you anticipate how it will be when you first hold your baby?

I’m not sure, to be honest. I feel like that will be a very surreal moment in which I’ll be pretty overwhelmed! Might take a minute to process that it’s actually my baby!

What would you like to say about the donor and that whole selection process?

This was by far the most difficult part for me. It is draining emotionally, mentally, and financially.

It was throughout this part that I questioned whether I could actually do this because obviously you don’t want to just select anyone.

In SA, there are three options: bring a friend to donate; use the Adelaide registry (which had nine donors at the time); or use the California Cryobank in America.

I opted to use an American donor as the options were greater. In saying that, I mean about 60 donors initially, and that list only became shorter as time went on.

Each week a ‘new’ list comes out, and you can read the profiles.

I found that between October and April, the number of donors had dropped significantly, and the process was becoming quite depressing, all-consuming, and overwhelming.

I had planned to have my first implementation in April 2024, but due to the circumstances (not having selected a donor), this didn’t happen until July 2024.

Is the egg process easy or difficult or something else?

Tricky question.

I wouldn’t say the process is easy by any means, but it’s achievable. There are multiple appointments, tests, and conversations that take place before you are required to undergo compulsory counselling sessions.

There is a huge financial outlay, some of which Medicare covers; however, this must be paid upfront.

That is a scary prospect, because while you know the cost of the egg-freezing process, there are incidentals with scans and ultrasounds, appointments, medications, and the uncertainty of not knowing how many cycles you will need along the way.

This is before the cost of sperm, which I was not prepared for.

This is a huge expense, and again, the uncertainty of being successful in securing your chosen donor and the considerations to be made around quantity are super stressful and overwhelming.

There is also the unknown of how many eggs will be retrieved and whether or not they are viable. I was lucky and had a significant number of eggs harvested in one cycle. Some women are not that lucky; some women have no viable eggs retrieved.

The process doesn’t end there, though. You need to make decisions around whether you want to freeze eggs or fertilised embryos (which have a higher rate of survival).

However, I hadn’t selected a donor at that point, so I had no option but to freeze eggs. Down the track, those little eggs need to survive the process of being defrosted, then insemination, and then growing into viable embryos. This is where the number decreases significantly. For me, my number dropped by two-thirds. All of this comes at another cost and keeping them in storage also incurs a six-monthly fee.

I don’t want to scare people off, but I want people to be prepared and aware. This is not something you can go into lightly. You need to consider all of your options, your financial viability, your emotional and mental well-being, and the village you have to support you. It’s absolutely achievable, but you need to be prepared for the impact this will have on your life.

And then there’s the raising the tiny human part at the end of all this. For me, it is 100 percent worth it. I know this is the right choice, the best choice, and the most important choice I will ever make.

Has it been easy? No. But I will only ever look back and know how blessed I am to have had the opportunity to create my own little family and to realise my dream of becoming someone’s mum.

Note: Chantelle plans to return to work at the Michelle DeGaris Memorial Kindergarten in 2026.

This article appeared in the Naracoorte News.