In a compassionate reversal of a previous decision, the Naracoorte Lucindale Council has this time unanimously agreed to waive all cemetery fees for children up to the age of 10, excluding the cost of plaques.

This motion, which had been rejected in May, received full support from elected members in the council meeting held on July 22.

The motion was moved by Cr Monique Crossling. She had moved the same motion in May.

In the weeks following the May vote, councillors had the opportunity to listen to the community.

Additionally, following an invitation from deputy mayor Cr Abigail Goodman, they had a confidential briefing from Olivia Savvas MP, chair of the Select Committee into Stillbirths in South Australia.

During the recent July meeting, some councillors expressed regret over their earlier decision, sharing how the emotional fallout had deeply affected the community.

Speaking during the discussion, Cr Crossling said her motion this time was backed by a petition from the community.

“To better understand public sentiment and ensure their voices were heard, I asked the community to sign a petition,” she told the council.

“Close to 700 individuals signed to support it. To maintain transparency, approximately 150 of those signatories reside outside of our council area, many of them ex-residents.

“Which means around 570 of those residents are ratepayers of the Naracoorte Lucindale Council.”

She urged fellow councillors to act in the community’s best interest, guided by compassion and public sentiment.

“I want to acknowledge that grief has no age limit and that this motion is not about valuing one life or one kind of grief over another,” Cr Crossling said.

“It’s about starting somewhere. It’s about a small, compassionate, practical gesture that this council can realistically support today (July 22).

“My motion proposes that we waive all cemetery fees for stillborn babies and children up to the age of 10, excluding plaque costs. I want to be very clear that this is not about money. I have never argued for or against the idea based on cost. I only referenced a small financial impact as an average of about $330 a year for the past 15 years to show that this is well within our means.”

Cr Crossling said if anything, they believed that the community would prefer the elected members to ask harder questions about other spending rather than resisting a motion like this.

She added that, if anything, residents would rather see councillors scrutinise broader spending decisions more closely than resist compassionate measures like this one.

“One community member wrote to us all that this is not a financially reckless proposal; it’s about a human one.

“It’s about dignity, it’s about empathy, and doing what we can as a council to ease one burden for one family, for families during the unimaginable loss of a child.”

Mayor: Two sides to the motion

Contributing during the debate, mayor Patrick Ross said he had received emails and met with members of the community over the motion.

“I agree there are two sides to this motion,” Mr Ross said.

“My belief is that we’d still question down to its simplest form—does it pass the pub test to waive all burial fees in relation to stillbirths and young children,” he said.

Mr Ross said it does.

“Death and dying are real. Grief and grieving are part of the process. As difficult as it may seem, we all go through this process at some time,” he said.

“Yes, there are funding sources available to some, not all, from various government authorities.

“This is not about money. It’s about something we as a council can do to wrap our arms collectively around a family during their grief.

“The questions for this chamber now centre around the age for which we wish to waive fees.”

The mayor highlighted that the scheduled fee structure until July 22, 2025, was a 50 percent discount up to the age of two. He said the motion before council was up to the age of 10.

Based on discussions with committee members, Mr Ross said they had suggested up to 18 years.

“The answer lies somewhere in the spread. There is no wrong or right answer to the age, as we have seen from the response from councils around the state,” he said.

“This has been a difficult subject for some, and I am certain we in this chamber this evening (July 22) will do what is best in relation to the motion before you.

“We are not obliged to do anything at all. Over the last month, the community in general has believed there needs to be sympathy shown by this chamber in relation to the waiver of fees.”

Strength in informed, values-based decision-making

Contributing to the debate, Cr Goodman said post the May council meeting she had reflected deeply, taken the learnings, and listened to community feedback.

“When I stood to speak on this motion at our May council meeting, I did so with a heavy heart and a conflicted mind,” she said.

“The question before us was not just about procedure—it was about people. About families. About grief. I said then that I was torn, and I meant it,” the deputy mayor said.

“Since then, I have worked constructively and collaboratively where I can find a way forward for this council and the community.”

Cr Goodman thanked council CEO Kelly Westell and the mayor for working alongside her to help bring greater understanding to the issue.

“Together, we invited Olivia Savvas, chair of the State Select Committee into Stillbirth, to address the council at a briefing session. Her insights were thoughtful and sincere, and they highlighted the heartbreaking and humbling realities that families face when impacted by stillbirth.

“There is no uniform answer, no right or wrong here, but there is strength in informed, values-based decision-making and leading with compassion and integrity.”

Cr Goodman said in most decisions that have come before the chamber, the community expected elected members to approach matters through the lens of governance, policy, and procedure.

“They expect rigour. They expect precedent. They expect us to weigh costs and consult frameworks and, often, to deliberately remove emotion from the equation. This was my original approach and is a key strength of this chamber.

“But tonight (July 22), I want to say clearly: this issue is an exception,” she highlighted.

Cr Goodman said losing a child was unlike any other experience—it’s not political.

“It’s not administrative. It’s personal. Profound. Life-altering. As I referenced in my letter to the editor, published in the Naracoorte News, my own family has felt the devastation of stillbirth. And I know we are not alone.

“When families face the heartbreak of the loss of a child—I understand the importance of having the quiet reassurance that your community stands with you and the acknowledgement of the loss.”

And she said quietly and without fanfare, the council had been supporting grieving families for many years.

“Our current policy already waives 50 percent of the burial fee for children aged 2 and under, and we did it because it was the right thing to do. Because it reflects the compassion we feel for our community.

“I want to thank those in our community who contacted councillors—who shared their stories, offered reflections, and brought this issue into sharper focus,” Cr Goodman added.

Cr Dennis: “…was a mistake”

Speaking during the discussion, Cr Tom Dennis said the decision in May not to vote in favour of the motion was a mistake.

“I speak tonight (July 22) with humility in regard to the previous decision of one of those who voted in favour not to waive the burial fees of stillborn babies and children up to the age of 10,” Cr Dennis said.

He said the decision, upon reflection, was a mistake.

“At the time, the motion may have been viewed through the lens of policy consistency or financial discipline.

“Since then, we have listened and truly listened to the stories of families who have faced the unimaginable loss of a child.

“Their words have stayed with us; their courage has reshaped our understanding of what this motion truly represents,” he added.

Cr Dennis said the motion was not about cost.

“This is about compassion. It is about dignity, and it is about ensuring that in the most painful moments, families are met with kindness and not bureaucracy.

“Only a small number of families are affected by this each year. For them, this gesture means everything. It sends a message that their grief is seen and a light of their children, however brief, are on it.

“I have reflected, and I believe compassion must guide our decision in this case.”

“Most mentally draining decision”

Cr Damien Ross labelled the council’s May decision as the most mentally draining decision of his 15 years of being on the council.

“My position and support for this motion hasn’t changed. Thank you, Cr Crossling, for putting this motion back up for consideration,” he said.

“This whole unnecessary drawn-out process has been the most mentally draining decision of my 15 years of being on the council. I felt physically sick when the motion was originally voted down and the continued justification discussed in subsequent conversations and meetings.

“The adverse emotional impact on the original decision has been profound, and not just within our community, but out in other communities as well,” he said.

Cr Ross reminded the chamber that elected members were voted in by the community.

“When making decisions, we will be guided by the influence of our family, our friends, our acquaintances, and our principles.

“However, we must make the conscious effort of stepping outside of that circle of influence and principles to put ourselves in someone else’s position to understand the impacts of their decision. Compassion and empathy should be evident in our council decision processes,” he said.

Cr Craig McGuire thanked Cr Crossling for her leadership on the matter.

No other councillors spoke on the motion.

This article appeared in The Naracoorte News, 30 July 2025.
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